Understanding Trauma: It’s More Common Than We Think

What is Trauma?

When I worked as an addictions counselor, I would run a therapy group about trauma. Many of my clients would think that trauma only happened to soldiers, but that's not true. Trauma can come from many things in life. It might be from abuse, being left alone or abandoned, experiencing racism or discrimination, or feeling different because of your sexuality. It can also come from going to prison, being homeless, not having enough food, or being poor. Even big events that affect everyone, like COVID-19, can cause trauma. Many people are surprised to learn they've experienced trauma. It's much more common than we realize.

How Trauma Affects Us

Dr. Bessel Van Der Kolk, a doctor of psychiatry and neuroscience at Boston University, wrote a famous book called The Body Keeps the Score. He explains that trauma affects both our mind and body. For example, someone who was hurt as a child might always try to be very quiet and polite as an adult. They might sit very stiffly or stand in a way that makes them look small. They might avoid exercise because it reminds their body of the bad things that happened. The important thing to remember is that these behaviors aren't because the person is bad or weak. They're because trauma actually changes how our brain works.

Trauma vs. PTSD

It's important to know that trauma and PTSD (Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder) are not exactly the same. Everyone with PTSD has experienced trauma, but not everyone who has experienced trauma develops PTSD. PTSD happens when someone keeps reliving a traumatic event in their mind. They might have flashbacks or suddenly feel like they're back in that traumatic event.

How Trauma Changes How We See Things

Trauma can make us react differently to normal situations. For example, a strict teacher might seem scary to most kids. But for a child who was abused, that teacher might remind them of the person who hurt them. This might make the child hide, fight, or freeze up. People who have experienced trauma might also be more reactive. A gentle touch, a door slamming, or a rainstorm might make them panic.

How to Help Heal from Trauma

Dr. Van Der Kolk suggests a few ways to help heal from trauma. He emphasizes the importance of community. A key part of healing from trauma is being able to process and accept it with support from others. He also encourages individuals to do some kind of physical activity (like running or martial arts) to reconnect with and strengthen the body. On a more experimental level, Dr. Van Der Kolk has put together a child-like sensory gym with his lab in Boston. Here, adults are encouraged to play and rebuild a positive relationship with their bodies. This likens to a term you may have heard lately: reconnecting with your inner child.

Trauma and Substance Use

Back when I was a counselor, I would have clients who refused to believe that their substance use was bad for them. A trick I would use was to ask them “What if it was you child? Would you be okay with your son doing what you do now?” That would always result in a loud “No! Of course not!”. I say this because around 45% of people with PTSD also struggle with substance use disorder (according to The National Center for PTSD). In these moments it can be helpful to picture yourself as your inner child. How would they react to this abuse? How can we take care of this child?

Remember

Trauma is not your fault. It doesn't mean you're broken or bad. It just means you've been through tough times and haven't had the chance to heal yet. But with the right help and understanding, healing is possible.